Mohawks Rock

If any of ya'll have heard my stealing stories (cuz you know we all like to brag) you might notice there's usually the same pattern(s) I follow. So far I'e never been caught so here goes nothin-

1.DON'T GET SEEN! - the obviously most major rule, this means mostly by employees and especially cameras. Although a camera can't actually STOP you from shit, it gives you plausible deniabiltity.

2.Dazzle the cameras- Make a show if possible. Talk to employees, ask questions about products to the people at the monitors. Also, BLEND IN, go in an area with people, as they're usually distracted with their own shopping.

3. GET THE FUCK OUT- once you've actually concealed the merch, head for the exit. This one is one of my favorites. Don't loiter, no hanging around trying to look cute, just get the fuck out.

4.Don't trip - the alarms. Check stuff for magnetic strips and stickers. Just remove it and stick it on anything else. be careful it doesn't stick to your clothes or bags.

5.DO NOT steal from WalMart!!! I can't say it enough. Just about everyone I know who's tried has been busted. I have a few times in the distant past and it was nerve racking. There is so much in place to prevent theft in the last few years. Major major national stores and most malls are a no no. Like: Target, Walgreens, BestBuy (although I got a Deathklok cd two years ago)

6. Stay alert and calm- No one but you knows your intentions. Be aware of your surroundings.

7. Unless you have NO money- don't take anything of more value than the cash you have on hand. Eh

8.For liquor- use the buddy system especially if you're under 21. And generally buy one bottle of beer.
For 6 packs or less, buying one or two cans of cheap beer will do the trick. Alone, use bag method.

9. If you trigger the alarms on your way in leave your bag up front (which is always a pretty good idea) joke with the employee and this almost guarantees a free ride out

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Replies to This Discussion

fuckn a man....your fuckn right on how to jack shit dude an fuckn right bout wall mart. i did lift a tv there once an the fuckers let me walk the fuck out. i put it in my cart....then went out of the TV section...lookin around the fuckn stoor.....then went to the front of the store...had a receipt in my fuckn hand which they thought was for the TV but was for a fuckn bandanna i bout 2 days earilier that i bought just to get a fuckn receipt. the shit holes thought the receipt was for the TV an thought i paid for it in the TV section while the shitholes in the tv section figured i was gonna pay for it up front when i was done shoppin. otherwise avoid fuckn walmart
That is fuckin HILARIOUS!! A lot of times with big shit, they'll actually hold the doors open for you.
fuckn rite man
hahahah everyone you know has been caught at walmart????

wow...me and my friends have made it out with 2 bottels of vodka, a airsoft gun, cd, shit tone of art supplies and about 5 cans of rustoleum spray paint. and i know theres been more.

to tell you the truth, walmart/mijer has been the easyist places to rack shit
That's balls deep, man. I'm a liquor/beer stealer. Mostly grocery stores. Wal Mart is a zero go for my end of the trade.
dude seriously?

how can you people get caught in walmart????

i just cant grasp this
stoney brew is so fuckn easy to lift man....fuck em...an thank the fuckers for keepin us wasted. when i wear my old jncos i stick a 24 ozer or quart in my ass pocket....can always put a 24 ozer or bottle of jack d an shit in my jeans inside pocket....aint that what those pockets r for
you and your fuckin jncos
dude they fuckn work for jackin shit man...thats why i still wear the fuckers
I've got a friend at a local alternative clothes store who lets me :D There isn't even a door alarm! It's just cameras and employee eyes. I got to the changing room and neither of those are an issue.
ONE MORE -- Go with somebody that's VERY comfortable stealing. Distract the fuck outta the cameras for them.
The buddy system goes a long, long fuckin way!!

I've observed very very few (if any) cameras in isles with larger things like furnisher, tables, beds, chairs, teh like and whatnot, not to mention very few people. I never pocket in front of ANYONE unlesss they're with me. I'm over safe when i'm shopping, only takes once. I also never carry my ID with me if i go out specifically for shopping, i try not to pocket in front of any cameras but places like joanes fabrics, and arts and crafts stores it's sort of unavoidable. I've tried the asking employees for directions/advice/etc and i don't like it, i dont look like someone who'd talk to employees so when i do i usually get odd looks. Also the regular things like body language, is pretty imporant, not looking like a fucking puppy who shit in the corner when you walk out the doors is generally a plus.

I occasionally do this trick when i'm taking in big, i take a cardboard box and cut it up to fit in my bag/backpack/satchel/etc and empty my bag, so when i enter the store my bag already looks full when in reality theres a wide open space to fill it up with as much as you can, when you leave, it looks exactly the same as when you entered, no difference in size or bulge haha.

When i go to fred myers and steal shite, (usually coricedin), i get a cart/basket and fill it with a couple random things that i'm not getting, so i'm not just walking around with 6 boxes or coricedin and a pack or red and black sharpies. instead its 6 boxes of cccs, cough drops, oj, sharpies, and a notebook, slightly less suspicious if an employee decides to be that inquisitive.

Safe shopping everyone.

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