The Rules! Of! Punk!

Thought punk didn't have rules, eh? You're wrong, fuckers! Punk is dead and all, so to bring it back we need to lay down the law and.eliminate the poseurs!

1. The number one rule of punk is that you are not punk. Do not, in any situation, refer to yourself as punk. Referring to yourself as punk is automatic grounds for your exclusion. From punk.
2. Everyone except you and your group of friends is a poseur. Not that you call yourself punk.
3. Every time you call someone else a poseur, you become that much more punk. Just don't fuck it up by going and admitting that you're punk. Poseur.
4. Pop-punk is no longer a subgenre of punk. The name pop-punk is now reserved to be used exclusively as an insult for bands that are poseurish.
5. If a band gets more than 500 fans, they are a pop-punk band.
6. Do not get a mohawk, dye your hair funny colors, wear bondage pants, or a studded jacket. This is known as trying too hard.
7. Any association with the store Hot Topic is poseurish. No exceptions.
8. Punk is dead. Shout this often.
9. Remember unity! Too bad everyone around you is such a fucking poseur or you'd have a use for it.
10. Be an asshole every chance you get. Everyone knows that "punk" is synonymous with "asshole". Prove them right!

Know any more rules? Tell me! Or don't. Poseurs.

(If you can't tell this post is a joke, so help me God...)

Comment by George Hart on September 4, 2009 at 1:05am: I didn't see the disclaimer. But, seeing as I'm not a moron, I still got that it was a joke.

So, I say this with all the love in the world, if you didn't get this was a joke, you are one of the dumbest fucking people on Earth and should probably have yourself killed (be sure to get someone else to do it because you'll just fuck it up).

Rule# Whatever: If you get mad about any of the rules, you're a poseur.
Rule# Whatever +1: If you're dumb as fuck, you must be punk.

Comment by George Hart on September 4, 2009 at 1:06am: Oh, ya. When I read the first post, I smiled a lot :)

Comment by Josh Pepe on September 20, 2009 at 3:57pm: ok first douche bag who said I was fake fuck you , my pic is on google but my pic isch real , and the other pics are like band pics and shit because my broke ass has no camera so sod the fuck off

Comment by Josh Pepe on September 20, 2009 at 4:01pm: except the picture of me and my brother and my ex girl friend that one is also real..
and like i said my profile pic is real my friend took it when we were in some city in illinois , we were train hopping , so fuck anyone on here who thinks i'm fake just because i'm not vain enough to take a million fucking photos of myself , fucking seriously.....

Comment by sXedevotchka on September 21, 2009 at 8:59pm: hahaha it's sad though that some punks actually have this mentality. learn the rules-then break 'em.

Comment by Bad Trash Benji on September 23, 2009 at 1:56am: I love it. Good sarcasm, humour and it works great for highlighting retards. Excellent!

To Pez: make disclaimer larger, brighter, and possibly flashing next time... AND maybe at the top of the page if not the title... Or not as the idiots while making me face palm also made me laugh( reply's/help to the idiots made me laugh too).

Comment by Khaos on September 24, 2009 at 11:24am: Yeah... you totally missed the memo at the bottom saying "(If you can't tell this post is a joke, so help me God...)"

and all the 80some odd posts before yours. ;-)

Comment by gaby on September 24, 2009 at 12:20pm: haha this is hilarious.
it reminds me of this website: howtobepunk.com
for those of u who don't understand sarcasm, it's sarcastic too

Comment by Andrea on October 8, 2009 at 4:10pm: You are a complete douche.Yes you,the one who wrote these "rules".
Dont you realize you forgot the most important rule of all?

DONT PUT PUNK AND RULES IN THE SAME SENTENCE