The Rules! Of! Punk!

Thought punk didn't have rules, eh? You're wrong, fuckers! Punk is dead and all, so to bring it back we need to lay down the law and.eliminate the poseurs!

1. The number one rule of punk is that you are not punk. Do not, in any situation, refer to yourself as punk. Referring to yourself as punk is automatic grounds for your exclusion. From punk.
2. Everyone except you and your group of friends is a poseur. Not that you call yourself punk.
3. Every time you call someone else a poseur, you become that much more punk. Just don't fuck it up by going and admitting that you're punk. Poseur.
4. Pop-punk is no longer a subgenre of punk. The name pop-punk is now reserved to be used exclusively as an insult for bands that are poseurish.
5. If a band gets more than 500 fans, they are a pop-punk band.
6. Do not get a mohawk, dye your hair funny colors, wear bondage pants, or a studded jacket. This is known as trying too hard.
7. Any association with the store Hot Topic is poseurish. No exceptions.
8. Punk is dead. Shout this often.
9. Remember unity! Too bad everyone around you is such a fucking poseur or you'd have a use for it.
10. Be an asshole every chance you get. Everyone knows that "punk" is synonymous with "asshole". Prove them right!

Know any more rules? Tell me! Or don't. Poseurs.

(If you can't tell this post is a joke, so help me God...)

Comment by pissy prissy on March 28, 2009 at 9:46pm: people are way too judgemental... thats all im gonna say

Comment by James on March 29, 2009 at 12:06am: punk is anti-fashion, but its also a fashion, so make sure to buy all the newest expensive punk clothes from angry young and poor. thrifting is for posers who probably dont even have enough money to get bondage pants, dont thrift or your a crusty, and crust punks arent even punk.

Comment by Khaos on March 29, 2009 at 1:14am: Joey, I think you also missed the memo. I'm pretty sure a lot of people agree with what you said at one point or another. ..... the whole joke part seems to also have been missed on your part. It's just for fun.

Comment by Khaos on March 29, 2009 at 1:15am: LOL AYP. I forgot all about that! And what about buying your "diy" vests off of ebay, eh? That's totally punx rawk!

Comment by Adam, Mohawked LMT on March 31, 2009 at 11:46am: Love the post, hilarious! And the fact that some people are pissed that you posted it, also Hilarious.

Comment by BurfRiot on March 31, 2009 at 1:38pm: rule 17 :if you sit in front of your computer all day long looking for rules about how to be a punk then youre a fuckin poser Rule18 :if you try tu put some rules about punk then youre a poser!CHAOS DRUNK PUNX ITS A FUCKIN WAY OF LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment by Khaos on March 31, 2009 at 2:06pm: Burf, if you don't know the rules, you're a fuckin poseur! ;-P

Comment by zero on March 31, 2009 at 3:14pm: If you somehow manage to read the post, then scroll past everyone's comments about the post, then type a comment while the comments posted directly above yours all talk about how the post is a joke, maybe you're not a poseur, but you're not especially intelligent either.

Especially if the person who made a post that talks about how bright colored mohawks are poseurish has a picture of herself with a bright pink mohawk as their userpicture.

Comment by BurfRiot on March 31, 2009 at 7:52pm: id better like being a poser than a straight edge you jerk at least i can still whack off and get high remember rule number 19 ASSHOLE NEVER DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!so im an asshole ,its better than be an american fuckhead i may be an arrogant fuck but at least im something youre not and never have the balls to try so take my squeegee up your ass khaos youre a fake probably the anarchy and peace kind so fuck off anyways i quit i gotta drink a beer